As a Mother of 3 growing teenagers,I wonder how I didnt see this coming…
They are going through the overwhelming stage of internal and external struggles.A phase when every teenager experiences the persistent chorus of raging hormones that transforms even the most sensible ones into lovelorn souls craving to dwell in the hearts of every second person they meet..An age when friends approval means everything to them and parents r like a road block obstructing their path leading to happiness…
I have always been a liberal Mother,more of a friend to my kids and they have shared everything happening in their lives without any hesitation or fear.
But lately my role as a navigator in their lives is oddly replaced by friends,mobiles,laptops.They have essentially become my children’s compass entrusted with the responsibility of showing them the right direction.
I dont always reprimand them for their unruly behaviour or even their budding friendships encroaching upon the family time.I also try to understand their predicaments and their need for space and freedom.I constantly strive to be a friend who is approachable and accessible but also feel the need to develop courage and self restraint interwoven with the responsibility of parenthood.
Sometimes I feel my lineant attitude towards them stems from the fear that they will get distant from me and under any circumstances I do not want to close the communication channel between us as that is the only way I can keep a track of what’s happening in their lives.I am confident that with my knowledge, experience and wisdom I can develop a higher calibre and deep layerd friendship with them.But I cannot forget my prime duty is to instill the core values of discipline,honesty and character in them so that they become resilient and feel gratitude even in the lifes most challenging moments.
I am constantly striving to build a rapport with them so that they value my concerns and consider my advices impactful.In the matters of the heart,I am hoping my friendly attitude will make them feel comfortable to share their experiences but as a Mother I need to reinforce the important values that will build them happy and secured relationships in the future.I want them.to learn to differentiate between facts and fiction and stay grounded in every situation.
I always remind my sons to respect girls and treat them just the way they would expect other boys to treat their sister.
I tell my daughter that she can reach as high as humanly possible.
However I am clueless about how to make them understand there is a thin line between being a friendly mother and a MOTHER and they should always respect that….
As a Mother who gets frantic with worry when they are even half hour late I feel that I want the day to speed up,but the Time to go slow…..so that they remain my little babies for la long time when I can protect them from all problems and ensure their safety at all times.
I know this is just the beginning and there will be many hurdles to cross,many storms to face, but for my children I will always find a way or MAKE IT .
To all the mothers struggling like me,it is aptly said…There is no way to be a perfect mother,but million ways to be a GOOD one..